Bear’s Creative Writing
“I Am a Monster”
This piece was based on what I believed to be the internal (and likely subconscious) logic of three friends… people I care about who have wrestled with intense self-hatred. One of them said it was “100% accurate.”
It’s ugly. It’s honest. And it’s not a cry for help. It’s a portrait of how self-loathing thinks. If you recognize parts of yourself in here… I see you. You’re not alone. And you’re not beyond healing, no matter what your brain says.
Content warning: intrusive thoughts, self-hatred, and emotional intensity.
“Pearl Divers”
I wrote this story in July 2023, the day I stepped away from Tuonela Magazine and suddenly found myself overwhelmed by “grelief.” I was sitting in the sauna, crying and listening to Auri’s “Pearl Diving,” and thinking about what it means to form unexpected, life-giving friendships.
This piece came from that moment: a tribute to a friend who inspired me when I didn’t know I needed inspiring.
It’s a story about taking a risk on friendship with someone who gets it. About being seen and daring to seek beauty together.
“Elegy for a Lost Soul”
This was written instantly after the last time I ever spoke with my adoptive son. At the time, he was still alive, but had chosen the path of destruction over redemption. He passed away five months later.
This poem is a farewell, an explosion of anger and grief, and a expression of love that never stopped.
“I See You”
This was written based on a F(r)iction prompt for my adoptive son, Riku, during a time when he was starting to believe he could be loved.
It made him cry, and he asked me, “How do you see this?”
I told him, “Because you showed me.”
This is a letter to him, but it’s also for anyone who’s ever felt like too much and not enough at the same time. You are seen. You are loved.
“Magic Is Real”
This piece was written in under ten minutes based on a F(r)iction prompt. It reflects on the many small, magical influences that led me toward storytelling, from Tolkien and video games to music, tabletop roleplay, and my mother’s quiet encouragement. It’s a story, a memory, and a kind of spell.
“Brocéliande”
A Discord songwriting challenge led me back to a forest I visited in 2009: Brocéliande, the legendary woods of Merlin and the Vale of No Return. I decided to write a piece inspired by its mythic aura, and play with alliteration while I was at it. The result is something between lyrics and spellcraft, steeped in old trees, fae vibes, and the kind of magic that lingers in language.
“The Clock Ticks So Loud (When You’re Gone)”
The Clock Ticks So Loud (When You’re Gone) is a country ballad written in 2009 about silence, heartbreak, and the way time stretches when someone you love leaves without a word.